Dinner with Larry (the veggie pot pie) was great!  I did all the work myself, and made the veggie pot pie, mashed potatoes, and a mixed green salad with spinach.

I modified a chicken pot pie recipe.  Here it is:

• 1 cup sliced carrots
• 1 cup frozen green peas   (or four cups of any vegetables)
• 1 cup frozen green beans
• 1 cup sliced celery
• 1/3 cup butter
• 1/3 cup chopped onion
• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 3/4 cups vegetable broth
• 2/3 cup milk
• 2 (9 inch) unbaked pie crusts

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C.)
2. In a saucepan, combine all the vegetables. Add water to cover and boil for 10 minutes. Remove from heat, drain and set aside.
3. In the same saucepan over medium heat, cook onions in butter until soft and translucent. Stir in flour, salt, and pepper. Slowly stir in the broth and milk. Simmer over medium-low heat until thick.  Remove from heat and set aside.
   
4. Put the bottom pie crust in the pie pan, dust with egg whites, and cook for 5ish minutes.  (this makes sure it isn’t doughy) - do this step while the liquid is thickening
   
5. Mix the vegetables into the milky liquid. Pour entire mix into pie dish. Cover with top crust, seal edges, and cut away excess dough. Make several small slits in the top to allow steam to escape. Brush with egg whites.
   
6. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 35 minutes (on a cookie tray to prevent spills), or until pastry is golden brown and filling is bubbly. Cool for 10 minutes before serving.If the broth and milk isn’t thick enough, the pie will come out wet and will be hard to serve.  It will still be delicious, and will thicken once it cools a bit.  To make a chicken pot pie, cut vegetables to 2.5 cups, and one pound cut chicken.  Add raw chicken to the vegetables, and boil all for 15 minutes, instead of 10.  You can then also use chicken broth.  Four cups of vegetables would be good, and any kind of vegetables.  Even a bag of mixed frozen vegetables would be great.

We ate the entire pot pie!!! After dinner, we had to admit to Larry we didn’t have anything for dessert.  I mentioned that we had ice cream in the freezer, but we didn’t have any chocolate syrup or whipped cream.  I got out my computer, and found a super easy recipes to make chocolate syrup! (I had to cut it down, the original recipes served 32!)

* 1/4 cup cocoa powder (not sweetened)
* 3/8 cup sugar (3/8 cup = 3 oz, a bit under 1/2 cup)
* 1/16 teaspoon salt (half of a 1/8 teaspoon)
* 3/8 cup water
* 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

I got out some frozen strawberries we had in the freezer, defrosted them in the microwave, got out some peanuts, and we cut up a banana.  We were able to make banana splits!  We thought we had no dessert, but we ended up having a fabulous homemade dessert.  The chocolate syrup came out great.  It was a fantastic meal.  All aspects.  Plus, my dad did all the dishes!  That’s one thing I love about cooking, no one ever expects me to do the dishes!

Look at the empty pie dish in front of my dad!  That bowl with the red in it are the strawberries!

This was my bowl of ice cream.  It’s a bit messy, but it was yummy!

_______

In non-food news:

I applied to be a substitute teacher today for the Fitchburg Public School system.  I think I should also apply to the other two local towns, Lunenburg and Leominster.   Being a sub would be good hours for me, and I’d still have time for class, and to do my practicum.  I would also get very good experience working with kids.

I think I have decided that I want to do my internship with hospice (working with people who are going to die within 6 months).  I would be able to work with a wide range of clients.  Elderly who are dying and their families, and also younger people who are dying and their families.  Possibly even children who are dying, or working with young children whose parents are dying.  I think that it would be extremely hard, but I also think it would be extremely rewarding.  I think I will learn a lot about life, and about death.  There are hospice places in Leominster and Fitchburg, but I think I should venture out to Worcester.  It would be neat to work in a new community, and perhaps I will be motivated to go out after work.  Also, I definitely won’t have money to pay for an apartment to live anywhere else.  I need to stay living at home, and save all the money I possibly can.  I had to pay my Visa bill today (for my tuition bill); it was $1700.  I am just now starting to freak out over money.  The good thing is that I haven’t been buying anything lately.  My only expenses are gas (but barely), car insurance ($150 a month), and my cell phone ($60 a month).  I need to make at least $250 a month to break even.

I would like to go tomorrow to buy yarn for the afghan I want to knit.  Yarn is on sale (still $4.50 a skein, and I need 8 of them!) at Michael’ s Craft Store, and I have a gift card.    This is the afghan I want to make.  I like the colors, but I will make it without the fringe, because I read reviews that said it was annoying, and frayed a lot.

I am slowly getting things done.  I finally clearled out my magazines and put them in the recycling.  And of course, another Marie Claire arrived in the mail today.  D’Oh!  I got my oil changed this week, only 3,000 miles late!  D’Oh!  I cleaned my room up and bit (and completely made my bed - I never do that!).  I still have two piles of trash that need to be cleared out, including a hair dryer that I broke, because it fell off my bed one too many times (I would fall asleep with it at the foot of my bed, and kick if off). It was slowly breaking in half, and I kept having to push it back together.  Things would rattle inside, but it never caught my hair on fire.  This last time, it made a horrible noise and I smelled smoke, so I unplugged it and threw it in the trash.  I vowed to not buy another one, because we have two other hairdryers in the house that I can use.

I also want to rearrange my room.  It feels like time.  If I do, I’ll be sure to post before and after shots.

These are all little things, but it feels good to accomplish things.

I ordered a Diva Cup through our local organic foods store.  It ended up costing me $31.  On Amazon.com they’re only $17.50, but I figured with shipping, it’d be close to $25, and for the extra $6, it’s best for me to support a local business.  I’m excited to try it out, and hope it goes well.  I’ve heard lots of good things about them, especially on all the green chic blogs I’ve been reading lately.

First thing I saw this morning was that the stone house where Megan had her wedding reception this summer burned down!!!  It’s the stone house in this beautiful park in southern Fitchburg.  The park was devastated after the ice storm, and it has been locked up ever since.  When the fire officials got there, the fire had already been burning for several hours, and it was at the point where it had burned up all the wood, and there was nothing left but the stone.  I took a picture of the paper and e-mailed it to Megan because I thought that she’d want to know.  Her reply:  “That SUCKS!!!”

Here’s what the house used to look like.  It was very beautiful, and very unique.

I had to babysit today, and we had a winter storm all day.  Luckily, my car is pretty good in the snow, and I had no problems as long as I went super slow.  On my way home, I drove by my doctor’s office, and remembered I had an appointment scheduled for tomorrow at 2:45.  I decided that I’d stop by today and see if they had any cancellations.  I had a book with me, and I was okay with hanging out for a bit and waiting.  The lady checked me in, and I was seen within 5 minutes!  I didn’t get a chance to read hardly any of my book!!  The nurse practitioner I had the appointment with (tomorrow)  was in between appointments, and luckily I just had to chat with her for a bit.  It was perfect timing, and now I don’t have to trek out into Leominster tomorrow.  It was a great idea on my part, and another way that I cut down on driving.

When I came home from the doctors, there was about 6 or 7 inches of snow in the driveway.  I went inside, changed my clothes, ate an orange for fuel, and went out to face the snow.  It took me a couple tries, but I finally figured out how to start the snow blower.  I finished the driveway, and did all of our sidewalks and the paths to both our doors.  It took me exactly 50 minutes.  It was a good workout, but the snow had turned into freezing rain, and then regular rain, so I got a bit wet in the process.  My parents walked in the door about 10 minutes after I had finished, and as they opened the door, I heard my mom say “Do you think Robin did it?”  They didn’t know who had done the drive way!  Our neighbor had done it previously, and they weren’t sure if he was at it again!  But she walked inside and she asked if I had done it, and I told them yes. Not only had my mom gotten to leave work early (at 5pm, instead of 7pm), but both of my parents were able to come home and not have to go right back out to shovel.  It was nice that I was able to help them.  They were extremely thankful.  They even asked what they could make me for dinner!  I must admit, there was a moment when I was outside shoveling where I thought “screw making dinner, let’s get take out.”  But that thought didn’t last long.

At 6, I started to make dinner.  Last night, I made shrimp scampi for my dad and me, and mom ate it sans shrimp.  It was very good, and my mom loved the recipe.  Tonight, I made pasta e fagioli.  It was a very easy recipe, and maybe only took 15 minutes of prep.  The rest was just waiting for it to cook!  Both of my parents really liked it, but next time, I want to double the beans (two cans instead of one), and add less pasta.  But it was really good, and it was a recipe I had never made before!  My mom said this one was a keeper, as well.   (It thickened in the fridge a bit, that’s why it doesn’t look very soupy in the picture).

At 7:50, I left the house for Niles’.  Every Wednesday a bunch of us go over to his house to watch LOST.  It’s great fun.  Tonight, because the weather was so crappy, and because I had already done my fair share of driving, and not enough walking, I decided to walk.  It wasn’t too far of a walk, perhaps a mile.  But I made sure that I bundled up, and I brought an extra pair of pants and slippers just in case.  The slippers came in handy because my socks got wet and I put them on his radiator to dry (they didn’t).

My feet got VERY wet on the way home (I need wellies, not stupid snow boots that aren’t water proof). While walking home, there were 5 people in front of me, and each person had a dog.  I thought it was very strange.  But then I thought “Hmm… I wonder if they have some dog walking club.”  And then I thought that was a very neat idea.  Get a bunch of neighbors together who have dogs, and walk them together.  That’d be a nice way to spend time together, plus give your dog a walk and get a little exercise.  If I liked dogs (which I do not), then that’d be a cool idea.  I like the same idea with little babies and mom with strollers.

I really liked walking to Niles’ house.  I have been trying to drive less, and walk more, especially if it’s somewhere close by (mostly the gym, I haven’t treked to the grocery store yet this winter, but when it was warm out, I did a couple times).  But walking to Niles’ house tonight made me feel very British.  I like how they walk everywhere.  Even if it’s crappy out, or raining, they have to walk, because they (at least Mac and Megan) don’t own cars!  Your choice is to either stay home, or walk in the rain.  I have also decided that in my little house, I don’t want to ever have paper towels, a TV, or a microwave.  I can get by pretty well without a microwave.  While babysitting, I was thinking “Wow, I don’t remember the last time that I needed to use a microwave.  Except…. 5 minutes ago when I made this cup of tea.”  But I could easily make a cup of tea with an electric kettle or on the stove.  But other than today’s rare cup of tea (which I want to drink more of, and I bought I Love Lemon herb tea today!), I never use the microwave.  It’s pretty great.

I thought of a problem with my mini house idea.

Health Insurance.

I absolutely need health insurance, not just because I have a tendency to get sick…. but because I require a prescription to Synthroid for the rest of my life.  Without insurance, it’s about $40 dollars a month.  With insurance, I pay $22 (cause it’s a name brand - and has to be Synthroid cause of the cancer).  Plus, I’m also prone to tumors (thyroid and one in my left breast that was removed in 2004).  And I have GERD, which I have heard can cause esophegeal cancer.  Plus, I was a lifeguard in the hot sun for 40 hours a week for 7 summers, which isn’t good for skin cancer.  So…..  That could be a problem.

I know that in Massachusetts (where it is ILLEGAL to be without health insurance), they have Mass Health that anyone can get (please don’t question me about this, I’m still covered by my parents’ cause I’m still in school).  But I’m not sure about “down south” where I’d be living.  Could I use Medicaid?  Or, if I have a part time job doing MH stuff, then perhaps I could get it through my employer.  That is definitely something that I need to think about before moving off to my own little village.  Perhaps I should just move to southern Italy, Spain or Greece.  My guess is that they would have national healthcare.  Or perhaps by the time I’m ready to move down there (2010, 2011?)  President Obama will have some new awesome health plan.  My mom has just made me very aware of the fact that I can not let my health insurance lapse, because then people will refuse to cover me because of a “pre-existing condition”.  Which is bull crap!

So I need to think of that before I move.  Perhaps in my little village, I could have a doctor and a pharmecutical drug rep.  The rep could get me free drugs (the good kind), and the doctor could take care of my health.  It’s all about bartering, people.  Alissa proposed that she wanted to live in my village (and be the one with the real job), which is awesome.  But, I ask, what do you have to offer?

On a totally different note, I want a bowl of cereal.  I had dinner an hour ago (at 7:30), and I have been hungry ever since.  I had a serving of a Trader Joe’s vegetable lasagna, half a piece of Texas Toast, and a garden salad.  It wasn’t enough, especially cause the seving of lasagna was only 260 calories.   But, the good news is, that I now have tons of room for cereal!!!  I crave cereal every single night, and sometimes I have room for it, and other times not.  But when I get a craving, I can’t stop thinking about having a bowl of cereal until I actually eat it.  It’s weird.  Then, I’m done eating the serving, and I think “Oh no!  I want more!”  But I’m usually very comfortable on the couch, and can’t convince myself to get up and ger more (plus, I know my stomach can’t really handle it).

**Update, I ate a nice bowl of cereal at 9:30.  It was delicious.  I can’t wait to have another bowl tomorrow morning.  Yuuuuum.**

I was cleaning my room this morning (I am on a roll with the cleaning!) when I heard the familiar “ping”  of a message via GMail Chat.  I was surprised to see it was Megan, asking me if I was watching the Inauguration.  I had a plan to clean my room, go to the gym, have lunch around 1ish, and then go run errands to prep for dinner.  But instead, I went downstairs, watched the Inauguration of Barack Obama with Megan (via GChat), and ate lunch first, before the gym.  Then, I ran my errands, came home and prepped dinner (let the salmon sit in its sauce, and prepared the root vegetables so they’d be ready to be put in the oven when I returned), and then went to the gym.  As promised, I walked to the gym.  I was nervous that I wasn’t going to have enough time, but I cut my workout at the gym short to make up for the time spent walking.  Tomorrow, I have to babysit at noon, library meeting at 5:30, and then dinner at 7.  Because I don’t know what time I will get done babysitting, I’m going to the gym first.

I always try to count backwards when figuring out timing for things.  I need to leave the house by 11:30 (which will probably turn into 11:38, knowing me), so then I should be home and in the shower by 10:30, so I need to eat breakfast around 10 (takes me about 10 minutes to prepare my eggs and cereal), so to be at the gym for 45 minutes, plus a half hour for walking, I need to leave my house for the gym at…..  8:45.  I don’t like not eating breakfast first thing in the morning, but I figure I’ll eat an apple and/or an orange for energy before I leave.  That should be good enough.`

I read somewhere today that it isn’t good to chug water.  I guess our bodies aren’t equipt to handle all that water at once.  It doesn’t do anything bad, but the body can’t absorb it all for hydration needs.  That makes sense.  I also read that if you’re properly hydrated (not only should your pee be clear), but you should pee once every night.  I used to be able to wake up in the middle of the night, take my pill, and go right back to sleep.  Now, however, I try to do that, and all I can think is “Oh man, I have to pee.”  Which sucks, cause I really don’t want to get out of bed.  But of course, I can’t fall back to sleep, cause I have to pee so badly.  So I end up having to get out of bed anyway.  I should just get up right away without torturing myself by trying to convince my head that I don’t have to pee that badly.  When really I do.

I could use some book recommendations.  I started to read The Host, and it sucked.  I got to about page 15, and I’m pretty sure I’m giving up.  I think I read somewhere that you should at least give it to page 50 or 100 (I can’t remember which), but I don’t think I want to give it that much of a chance.  And so, I need more books to read.  My mom brought me home Snoop:  What Your Stuff Says About You, which I started and it’s interesting.  It looks at things like:  in a person’s office, are their photos facing them (which says “Aw, I like looking at my family, they’re great), or are they facing the visitors (which says, “Look at how great my family is.  I have this hot spouse, and adorable kids).  I’m only on page 20 or so, I fell asleep reading it on the couch (cause I was reclined, and my eyes were just so tired).  But I’ll pick it back up tomorrow.

I found an article, The Art of Living in Small Spaces, which had good tips about living in a mini house.  I’ve also found it interesting that in all of my “daydreams” of this little house, I’m by myself, doing my own thing.  I don’t have a husband/spouse/partner/boyfriend or anything.  Maybe if I do get a boyfriend, I’ll make him live in his own mini house.  There will be plenty of room, because I started a mini house community.  We will all barter with each other.  Some of us will grow lots of fruits and vegetables, and others will have real jobs and work outside the house.  The real worker will buy things like milk and pasta, and we will trade our vegetables and eggs with him for his purchased goods.  I could barter therapy with him, but there are strict rules for that.  Each person must agree upon the terms, and it’s better to trade services (I think).  Because if he loses his job, and can’t provide me with 15 pounds of pasta, and 15 pounds of flour, then should I just stop giving him therapy?  It would be better if it was a service, like…. he would mow the lawn every week or something.  One hour of lawn mowing for one hour of therapy.

I would prefer goods.  I can mow my own friggen lawn.  Maybe there could be a clause “In the event that pasta and flour can not be provided, ____ will be substituted.”  That way, I get what I want if at all possible, but there’s a “just in case” clause.

I have only one class left for my degree. Counseling Assessment and Case Management.  Everyone in the program just calls it “Case.”  It’s the last class - the one that is required before I can do my internship. It’s a six credit class, so it’s a double whammy.  We will meet every Monday night from 5-10.  Even though it’s only one class, it’s double the price.  I paid for the class last week and it cost me $1558. I put it on my Visa so I could earn points.  I will be able to pay off the bill in full, but just barely.  I’m not touching my real savings, so it seems like any money I ever make goes right to school.

Years ago I thought I’d be on track to save money for a down payment for a house. This was before grad school. Before all my earned money went to my education. It comes in, and then goes right back out.  It’s very frustrating.

I had a dream last night about Destare.  It was a good dream, and I woke up missing it.  I’ve had plenty of dreams about Destare, but they were all bad dreams, where either I was getting yelled at, or something else bad happened.  Even when things were good there, I would have bad dreams about the place.  When Lance and I were on good terms, I would tell him about my dreams.  I told him I was too involved with the place if I was having nightmares from it.  Back then, we thought it was funny.  So anyway, last night’s dream was good, and I woke up kinda regretting not working there anymore.  Well, not really, but I wished I hadn’t felt like that.  I just had to remember all the bad stuff, and that it HAD sucked, and it sucked a lot lately.  I hadn’t been happy there for months.  Stupid dream!

Since I’m not working at Destare anymore, I’ve been filling in more at Macy’s.  The store manager offered me a continuous weekend manager position, every Saturday night from 5-9:30, and all day Sunday.  I told him I wasn’t interested in working every single Saturday night:  I had just gotten off a job that did that.  I told him maybe I’d consider every other, but I wasn’t positive.  I’m working this Sunday, and my guess is he’ll ask me to work next weekend as well.  I don’t mind doing that, looking at my schedule and saying “yeah, sure, I’ll work.”  But I don’t want to commit to anything.  This Saturday I told him I was unavailable, because I’m going into Boston with mom and dad to go to a Thyroid Cancer Support Group at Mass General.  Then we’ll have lunch and go see Frost Nixen (or whatever that Nixen movie is called).  I’m also babysitting every Wednesday for my family in Leominster.  That’s an easy $50 for a fun afternoon of not doing anything.  They have family friends who are looking for a sitter, but they have four kids - 2,4,6 and 8.  That’s a lot of kids!  My mom also said she knows some people who are looking for sitters - so that’d  be interesting, too.  That will leave me available to do my practicum and have time for class.

I had applied for a part time job at MOC, and I got a call back today!  Unfortunately, she told me it’s a part-time/full-time job, with hours from 8:30 - 2:30, or 4:30 Monday through Friday.  I’m looking more for a job that is only three or four days a week.  I told the lady that I was sorry, but I can’t do full time.  That sucks, but it also wouldn’t be fair for me to get a job, and then have to leave for my internship. But it’s very exciting that I got a call back!  That means they saw my resume, was impressed, and wanted me to come in for an interview (which she gave me the option to if I was still interested).

Megan said that I should come see her in England and we can work on making lots of different food.  I said “Wow, I can come live there for three months like I did in Santa Fe!”  And she said “Well, I wasn’t thinking that long (cause I’ll be at work, and I don’t want you to get bored, plus it’s really expensive here), but I have a friend who maybe needs someone to look after her baby.  That’s in June, so maybe you could au pair for her?”  Holy crap would that be neat!  If I lived in England as an au pair for three months in the summer?  That’d be super cool.  I already have experience with my little baby here, and that’d be a piece of cake.  Little babies are easy, it’s when they start to crawl and run around and put things in their mouth that they’re harder.  But little babies just lie there, eat, and poop.  That’s nothing!  Megan keeps calling it my “post cancer trip.”  She’s so cute!

Emiliano will be very happy that I have been using Stumble Upon lately. While stumbling this morning, I found this quote:

Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.

~ Ellen Goodman

This is the exact reason why I want to move into my mini house, and NOT work.  Why do people work?  It’s stupid.  Think about it.  I don’t even need to mention any reasons, just read the quote.

I have been thinking more and more about the idea of me living a very minimalist life, and the thought makes me very, very happy.  I like imagining what it would be like, to live alone, to not have any worries, and to be able to wake up with the sun and work outside, and work, but work to live.  I don’t want to work for money: I want to work to eat, work to be healthy, and work to be happy.

Be happy.

I have not been happy lately.  There is nothing in my life that I am happy about.  That makes me very sad.  That is, in a word, depressing.  Megan said that I need to think about what things in this world make me happy.  Lately, all I enjoy doing is stumbling the internet, watching TV shows on my laptop, and reading books. I just started a new book called Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert.  My mother just finished it for bookclub, and she thought I would really enjoy it.  Gilbert goes through a terrible divorce, and she decides to move away for a year.  She lives in Italy and just hangs out and eats.  She makes friends, learns Italian, and she eats!  She’s a writer, that’s how she affords living without working for a whole year.  While in Italy, she writes about the difference between Americans working, and Italians working.

“Americans work harder and longer and more stressful hours than anyone in the world today. . . Of course, we all inevitably work too hard, then we get burned out and have to spend the whole weekend in our pajamas, eating straight out of the box and staring at the TV in a mild coma (which is the opposite of working, yes, but not exactly the same thing as pleasure).  Americans don’t really know how to do nothing.  This is the cause of that great sad American stereotype - the overstressed executive who goes on vacation, but who cannot relax.” (Gilbert, 61)

I don’t want to live like that.  I don’t want to live my life working everyday at a job that I don’t enjoy.  My sister works a 9-5 doing some sort of work for a large insurance company.  During her free time, she cooks delicious vegetarian meals for her and her husband, volunteers at a non-profit little art kitchen place called the Art House, and does environmental work.  She doesn’t get anything out of her job except money.  That can be said for a lot of people.  I don’t want to live like that.  I know Megan doesn’t want to live like that, either.

My latest TV show that I’ve been watching at the gym is Private Practice.  Adison Montgomery moves away from Greys Anatomy to LA.  She moves and starts working in this really cool private group practice; they call it a  medical co-op.  It has a very spa-ish, relaxing, dark colors, waterfall type feel.  There’s a beautiful lounge, a kitchen,  and a meeting room where they meet every morning to talk about their patients.  In the practice, there is a Ob/Gyn, a general practitioner, a holistic healer who does acupuncture, a therapist, and a doctor who specializes in helping women get pregnant.  All of the doctors are TV perfect (well, they’re all a little messed up - but good looking!), they’re all early 30s, and are pretty much friends.  They have fun together.  I would like to work in a place like that.  I want to work with people that I enjoy, I would like to work in a group practice like that.

Be happy.

Ok, so I will make a list of things that (will) make me happy.

• Reading
• Watching TV and movies
• Cooking and baking
• Gardening - growing flowers and my own food
• Going to farmer’s markets
• Riding a bicycle everywhere and not needing a car
• Having and caring for my own chickens (fresh eggs!)
• Baking fresh bread
• Working in a group practice, and enjoying it
• Knitting
• Exercising
• Being warm, and spending time out in the sun
• Hanging out with friends and family
• Blogging - both reading and writing
• Sleeping, and waking up early to make a wonderful breakfast

I was driving around today thinking how much I would love living in a little house, and then I remembered that I won’t be completely done with my degree until May 2010, and then I got sad again.  I guess all I can do is think about this crazy dream.  Maybe I will write a story about myself living in this house, and I will live vicariously through my writing.  I will also try to de-clutter my life, and do my best at saving money so I will be able to afford this house.

I feel that if I move down south into a little house, my parents will tell their friends “Well, she got cancer at 23, and then she went a little crazy.”

And it would be true.

I had Jim Lawrence for my very first counseling class, Counseling Techniques. He talked to us about having a professional library, and collecting all of the books that we use in school to then have when we go on to be professionals. It was something I had never thought of before, but it made a lot of sense. Since then, I started to save all of my books that I thought would be useful for my upcoming career.

I had Jim again for Couples Therapy last December when I was headed in for my surgery. My surgery was scheduled for December 17, 2007, the exact week of finals. I had to tell all of professors about my situation, and take all of my finals early. For Jim’s class, we had a paper due on Dec. 17th. I told him that I was going into surgery to remove a tumor on my thyroid, and he understood completely. He told me that he, too, was battling terminal prostate cancer. He had gone through treatment many times, but now, it had spread, and he was dying. He had never told a student before, and he was trying to continue life as normal as possible. He wanted to keep teaching for as long as possible because he loved it. He gave me as much time as I needed for my paper, and said that he could give me an incomplete if he had to, and I could pass the paper in in January. I didn’t want to have to work on the paper at all when I recovering, so I was determined to have it finished before my Monday morning surgery. Sunday night, I finished the paper, and gave my brother specific instructions on when and where to deliver my paper. Class was held Monday night at 5pm, and I wanted to pass my paper in!

Nine months later in September 2008, Jim was my professor again for Family Systems Therapy. Jim had spent 30ish years as a Marriage and Family Therapist. During our first class, he announced to the class that he was dying. Not only was he dying, but his loving wife had passed away in August, only two weeks before.

Jim was only our teacher for about 4 classes, when he got very sick and had to go into the hospital. They replaced him with another professor, and class continued. Jim died on December 3. He was a great professor, and he will definitely be missed.

Yesterday, as I was leaving the gym, I got an email from the counseling secretary that said that Jim’s family had dropped off all of the books from his professional library, and they were free to students to take as many as they wanted. I drove right to the counseling department after the gym to have a look. I ended up taking a box and a half (15 books maybe?) of books ranging from topics of how to talk to kids about divorce, couples counseling, family therapy, and a lot of other stuff.

I’m very excited, not only about all of my new books, but because they came from Jim Lawrence. Seeing these books on my book shelves, even twenty years from now, I will always remember Jim, and how wonderful he was.

I was reading in the Boston Globe today that living in the city is bad for your brain.  I guess that nature is very beneficial for the brain.  They’ve done studies that say that hospital patients do better when they can see trees from their window.

It says “While people have searched high and low for ways to improve cognitive performance, from doping themselves with Red Bull to redesigning the layout of offices, it appears that few of these treatments are as effective as taking a walk in a natural place.”

They even said that a long time ago, they realized this, and that is why Central Park is in the middle of New York City.  People need trees and nature.

This is why I think it would be absolutely wonderful to live in a tiny little house out in a field somewhere.

This house is only 681 square feet.  That’s pretty little.  It has two bedrooms, and is a little bigger than their teeny tiny houses, which are around 100-200 square feet.  I would want enough room to not feel claustrophobic, and also enough room to entertain for dinner.  I think the first floor would need to be an open layout for entertaining.  I would love to live in South Carolina, and grow my own fruits and vegetables.  I think these houses only cost about $20,000 to build (and $700 for the plans), so that’s a very tiny mortgage!  Also, I think I read that it’s only about $60 in heating and electricity bills.  Even if it is ten times that amount, $600 a year isn’t bad.  I would want a full size fridge, (or almost full size), because I know that Megan has a hard time with a mini dorm-size fridge in England.

If I had this house, and grew all my own food, I think I would only work as little as possible.  With my Mental Health degree, I could see patients two or three days a week, and the other days would be for my enjoyment only.  I think I’ve decided I’d like to live a very minimal life.  I know it’s very hard to believe, because I love shopping, and my Coach bags, and my iPhone.*  I would love to be able to live my days and do things that I enjoy.  I would knit, and I would write, and read.  I would cook fabulous meals, and run, and invite friends over, and drink wine, and eat cheese, and other wonderful things like that.

I think that I am very very worried that I will end up working at a job that I hate.  And I will wake up every morning not wanting to get out of bed; not wanting to go to work.  I figure with a mini house, and growing my own food, I won’t need a crappy job, because I won’t need that much money.  Maybe Megan and Mac (my sister and brother-in-law, who live in England) could live with me, and we’d live on a lot of land, and we’d each have our own mini house.  Megan and I could look into making organic things and selling them… either organic soaps and shampoos, or organic clothes.  We could have our own line, and money wouldn’t really matter, because we’d make anything we’d need.  We could work if we needed to, but what would be the point?  We’d have food, and a house with no mortgage, it would be awesome!

Thinking about that sounds absolutely fabulous, and it makes me wonder why more people don’t do something like this.  Is it because land you can grow on is super expensive?  Maybe we could live somewhere inexpensive, but still warm enough where we could grow things all year round - like Alabama or Tennessee.  We’d have our own land and our own community, so it wouldn’t be like we were really in Alabama, because we wouldn’t be going to the Piggly Wiggly or Billy Bob’s Country Cookin’.  We could still have cell phones and internet, but a TV wouldn’t be necessary (I’m going with Megan on this one - when I get my own place, I don’t want a TV).  We’d also need a good local library, because with a mini house, we wouldn’t have much room to keep our books.  I would say e-books would be good, but I’m reading the final Twilight installment as a PDF document, and it’s a huge pain in the ass.  I’m just clicking the down arrow constantly, and the clicking noise is driving me insane.

You know what else I would have with my tiny house?  Cats.  And a hammock.  Hammocks are wonderful.

I could go on for hours about how awesome this mini house idea is, but I have to go to the gym.  Then, I need to come home and help around the house.  My mom is being really wonderful, and is just letting me lounge around all day without saying anything.  I’m taking some well deserved time off, but I need to get my butt in motion and help out for the second half of the day.

*This past summer, I walked to the local farmers market, and I brought my Chico Bag with me, and I was being very eco, and was buying fresh produce, and supporting the local farmers, and I was walking!  But as I was walking home, I realized that I was listening to my iPhone and carrying a Coach purse.  It was quite the contradiction.  But, I was able to take this beautiful pictures with my phone, and I only noticed it because I was walking:

I have a calendar on my wall, and I put a big X on every day that I exercise.  Either cardio or strength training, and then I write down what I did.  Some days it will says “60 tread”  or “45 elipt.”  The number is the time I spent.  I didn’t do cardio today, because after I got home from babysitting, I was so sleepy I took a nap on the couch. I did do 30 minutes of a pilates video, so for today, it will say “Pilates, 30, abs, arms.”  There are 4 different workouts, abs, arms, thighs, hips.  I do two a day, then switch.

But anyway, the reason I wanted to write today, is that I bought my new 2009 calendar!  I needed one, and although my dad offered me his from Bryan’s Auto Repair, I wanted my own super cool calendar that I’d enjoy looking at.  Twilight calendars are sold out, and going for $60 on eBay, so that was out of the question.  I stopped at Barnes and Noble on my way home from sitting on the baby, and decided that because I had a gift card, I would buy one there no matter what (because I’m trying not to spend money this month, and gift cards don’t count).  I’d settle for Ansel Adams, or even one about cats (2008 was Kittens Every Day that Steve got me.  It had a little kitten on each day of the calendar.  Every month we picked our favorite kitten.  Awww.)

At Barnes and Noble, I was searching the calendars, and saw a Lord of The Rings.  Not a huge fan, but it’s ok.  I knew I was close.  Right next to it, I saw a single Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince 2009 calendar.  Last one!  I grabbed it.  $6.60.  Sweeeeeet.  Let 2009 and my obsessively keeping track of exercising BEGIN!

(Speaking of being obsessive, I have gone back and changed 2008 a Review about 12 times now.  You may want to check it out again… I added pictures of England, Niles, and other such things that I thought of later).  And another thing, it’s not really a review… it’s a synopsis.  Stupid Robin.  Here comes edit 13!

I don’t know if I want to call them resolutions, or challenges, or what.  Maybe “things I will try harder at.”  That might be good.  Let’s see….  I think there’s a lot that I’m thinking about.

• Drink more water (three of my camel backs a day…. 68 ounces or so)
• Carry water with me everywhere. I almost broke down and bought a Diet Coke the other day when I was out running errands because I was so thirsty.  I did not.  I haven’t had Diet Coke (or anything else with fake sugar) since Sunday when Megan was here.  12 days.
• Eat less crap! I’ve been eating cookies and stuff like they’re grapes!  I know that it’s because of the holidays, but still, it’s awful.
• Eat more good stuff.  Eat more vegetables (I eat enough fruit).  I’ve recently found that I love butternut squash, and Megan made those awesome baked vegetables that were fantastic!
• Keep exercising every day.  I’ve been kicking butt at exercising, and when I can’t go to the gym, I run outside (except for when it’s too damn cold - like today we’re at 12′F!!).  I want to get up to maybe 5 miles a day, that’d be cool.  I need to map out a course.  I should do at least one hour at the gym.  I need to do more with strength training, but I want Eric to make me up a plan that I can do at home with the stuff I have.  I have a Pilates VHS that I want to start using, now that we have a new VCR (my dad had to buy a new DVD-VCR combo after taking apart our old one - there was a BattleStar Galactica DVD stuck in it). Oh, and Megan has The Firm in her room on VHS I can do!  She made this great little schedule for it and everything, and never used it.  I’ll one up her and actually use it.
• If I’m going to be out and about, I should carry good food with me.  I can keep a bag of apples in the car, and because it’s winter, they’ll stay fine for weeks!  That way, when I get hungry,  I’ll have something good to snack on.
• Continue to cook dinner for my parents. Do more interesting things, not the same old over and over.
• Start keeping a medical journal! I have had soooo many medical problems in the last 7 years, that I won’t even list them.  Of course, I have no records of my own.  Nothing that lists how I feel, my symptoms, my medicine.  Nothing.  That’s stupid of me.  I need to start.  I do have a great day by day journal of how I felt going off of my medicine in May when I had my radiation.  I kept track of how I felt, what I was doing to keep my spirits up, and how much I weighed (cause going off the medicine can cause weight gain).  I also noted how I felt on a scale between poor, good, very good, and excellent (or some such scale).  In the new one, I’ll have it be a number scale from 1-100.  You have more options with a 1-100 scale than a 1-10, because no one would ever choose 6.7, but they would choose 67.
• Read more.  Read both for fun, and books that relate to Mental Health. I could read books about family therapy, or working with couples, or working with kids who have ADHD.  Books that I will learn from, not just escape reality from.
• Be more attentive to my wasting of energy. This morning, it was sunny in the living room, but I reached to turn on the light.  There was no need; I could see perfectly (I stopped myself, and didn’t turn it on).  I should focus on things like that, and not waste energy when I don’t need to.
• Keep it up with the 10,000 steps. If I can’t do 10,000 every day (because sometimes it’s just impossible), I would like to average 10,000 steps a day in a given week (so at least 70,000 a week).  There are some days when I’m at 20,000 for one day, and the next I don’t go over 5,000.  I’m okay with that, because the two average out to be 12,500.  That’s pretty good!
• Continue with keeping lists on my calendar of what I do for steps, and what I do for exercise. It’s great to keep track of things.  (If only I could find a Twilight calendar… they’re sold out everywhere, and they cost $60 on eBay and Amazon.com.  Seriously.  I’ll have to settle on Harry Potter.  I don’t think they make X-Files ones anymore).

I can’t really think of anything else.  There’s probably more I’d like to work on, but I can’t think of anything right now.  I’m too tired to think.

I think I’m going to do January as another Buy Nothing Month.  Soon I’m going to be sans employment, and I’m worried about spending money.  We’ll see, I guess.

My sister is doing Buy Nothing New Year.  She can buy used stuff, but nothing new.  That doesn’t include food.  Hopefully, she’ll blog about it, but she hasn’t posted since December 8th.  She’s a deadbeat.